OFFSTAGE -- The Actors of Pokémon, Parts 12-14
by Quill Xarxes
Summary: Our crew leaves Vegas and finds that, as a promotional thing, WB has invited their Japanese counterparts for a visit!


Part 12  
Viva Las Vegas 5  
  
Gary: (To Brock) Sigh, we're the only ones without girls.  
  
Brock: Ash Rocket and Quill don't!  
  
Gary: They ARE girls!  
  
Brock: They don't have guys either!  
  
Gary: Do you think  
  
Brock: NO.  
  
Quill: (Comes out) Hola!  
  
Gary: What does hola mean?  
  
Quill: You people are morons.   
  
Brock: Why are you out so late?  
  
Quill: Ash Rocket snores.  
  
Gary and Brock: OH.  
  
Quill: You guys got anything to do?  
  
Brock: No. Why?  
  
Quill: I'm goin' gambling. You boneheads wanna come?  
  
Gary: OK. I'll do something fun… with the boss…  
  
Brock: (sigh) Let's go Gary.  
  
Quill: We'll be back before anyone wakes up.  
  
Gary: What about Jessie and James? They never fell asleep!  
  
Quill: I, I don't want to think about it.  
  
*Later*  
  
Nana: I'm worried! Quill is missing!  
  
Ash Rocket: (Yawns) Don't worry about her. She knows what to do.  
  
Nana: (sigh) I guess you're right.  
  
*At the Casino*  
  
Quill: (Drunker than even James has ever been) Oh you two worry all you want about that green stuff you call valuable. Worrying'll just give you gray hairs! If you don't worry you'll always win!  
  
Dealer: You busted!  
  
Quill: Oh darn.  
  
Brock: Is that all your money?  
  
Quill: Not at all, I'll just (opens purse) Oh, wait it is!  
  
Gary and Brock: (groan)  
  
*At the Hotel*   
  
James: (Stares at the ceiling) Whoa, uh, that was… interesting…  
  
Jessie: Uh huh…  
  
James: I'm gonna go to sleep now.  
  
Jessie: Me too, I'm dog tired…  
  
*in the next room*  
  
  
Butch: What was that, I heard a noise!  
  
Brock: Shut up we can hear you out here!  
  
Butch: Where have you been???!!!  
  
Brock: Uh, Quill had a little too much alchohol there…  
  
Cassidy: She was drinking??!!  
  
Gary: No, someone spiked the punch!  
  
Brock: Have no clue who…  
  
Ash: (Comes out of his hotel room) God! I couldn't sleep all night!  
  
Gary: Why not?  
  
Ash: BECAUSE OF THIS!!! (Opens the door to Room 12 and Jessie and James fall out again)  
  
James: DON'T YOU PEOPLE KNOW HOW TO KNOCK! Now where'd I put my shirt?!   
  
Jessie: You are all against us you Antishippers!  
  
Quill: Heh, Antishippers! It sounds like, it sounds like, (snore)  
  
James: What happened to her?  
  
Ash Rocket: It's all because of Room 13! (Dramatic music plays)  
  
Nana: No good can come out of Room 13! (Dramatic music plays)  
  
Gary: What the… Room 13! (Dramatic music plays)  
  
Ash: Where's that coming from?  
  
---------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Part 13 (Dramatic Music Plays)  
  
Jessie and James: (Are walking toward their plane)  
  
James: You coming back next year?  
  
Jessie: I think so. Why, are you?  
  
James: It's a tradition that goes back for (counts on fingers) 5 years now! And it's been the same every year. Except this one.  
  
Jessie: I believe that one there!  
  
James: And it's the only place I've ever kept sober!  
  
Quill: Yo! Dudes! Wait up!  
  
James: Which is the least we can say for some…  
  
Jessie: We have the same plane… with the boss!  
  
Quill: Don't call me boss on vacation.  
  
James: We'll keep that in mind.  
  
Ash Rocket: How was you stay, Nana?  
  
Nana: Fine. Quill, how come you were always gone at night?  
  
Ash Rocket: She was GAMBLING!  
  
Nana: GAMBLING! You're underage!  
  
Quill: (Mumbles) Really good fake Ids  
  
Nana: I HEARD THAT!  
  
Quill: No you didn't!  
  
Ash: Happy Halloween everyone!  
  
All: HAPPY HALLOWEEN!  
  
Ash Rocket: This story wasn't very Halloweeny, was it?  
  
Quill: (Looks at Jessie and James) No, but some of it sure was scary!  
  
Meowth: THAT'S TIGHT! I HAD TO SHARE A ROOM WITH THESE TWO!  
  
Everyone: (shudders)  
  
Nana: Quill, we have to talk about this hentai trash you've been writing.  
  
Quill: I prefer to call it "Firecrackers"  
  
James: What are you talking about?  
  
Jessie: (Whispers something into James' ear)  
  
James: OH! (Laughs maniacally)  
  
Quill: Anyway, happy vacation! I'm really tired of writing these, so you all get a LONG BREAK!  
  
All: YEAH!!!  
  
------------------------------------------------------------  
  
(PS, I this is a PROLOGUE. This is supposedly where we left off, however it doesn't quite  
make sense at the moment. I'll fix it later. Also, when something *In Asterisks*, they are actually speaking Japanese.)  
  
Kojiro: *When are we going to get there?*  
  
Takeshi: *Shut up. You are annoying. We will get there soon enough.*  
  
Kojiro: *Good. I can't stand sitting by Musashi, she is nasty!*  
  
Musashi: *Now you just shut up.*  
  
(Meanwhile, in New Holstein...)  
  
Quill: You people are NUTS! How can you be happy about this?   
  
James: It would be neat to meet someone who looks just like me! Wouldn't you like to see someone who looks like you?  
  
Quill: I'm universal. I don't have separate actors dimwit.  
  
Jessie: I did some research. We don't have to worry much, all of them speak English, except Kojiro.  
  
Quill: That'll be fun! I speak... uh...  
  
James: Broken Japspanglish.  
  
Quill: I changed it. Now it's Japspandeutchlish.  
  
James: Ja.  
  
Quill: Ja.  
  
Jessie: WHAT???  
  
Quill: Uuis aiyon moro'nicu batu y uuis aiyon ore!  
  
Jessie: Whatever.  
  
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\  
  
Kojiro: *HELP ME! MUSASHI!*  
  
Musashi: *Why would I help you. I hate you.*  
  
Kojiro: *I don't speak any English! How am I supposed to figure out what this person's saying?*  
  
Man: DO-YOU-UN-DER-STAND-ME? WEL-COME-TO-AM-ERICA!  
  
Kojiro: *PLEASE?!*  
  
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\  
  
Quill: *HAHAHAHAHAHA! You can't understand a WORD I'm saying James!*  
  
James: Please don't do that.  
  
Quill: *In fact, I was spying on you and Jessie when you were*  
  
Japanese Counterparts: (Walk in)  
  
Musashi: Hello everyone. How are you doing?  
  
English People: (In unison) Fine.  
  
Takeshi: Wow! Dese peopre must be de most organized peopre in de worrd!  
  
Brock: Uh, Well, Uh...  
  
Quill: Trying not to say anything... trying not to say anything...  
  
James: So, uh, how's the weather in Japan?  
  
Musashi: *This is their idea of a greeting? How's the weather?*  
  
Satoshi: *I don't have a clue. Think of something to say back to them!*  
  
Musashi: Uh, fine, uh, how are your cows doing?  
  
Satoshi: *THAT'S YOUR BRILLIANT IDEA OF A GREETING???*  
  
Musashi: *Well the fricking town's named after a cow!*  
  
James: Wow, Kojiro, you look just like me!  
  
Kojiro: *I really have to learn English! C'mon! Tell me what they're saying!*  
  
Quill: He says his is bigger than yours.  
  
Kojiro: What?!  
  
James: Translation, Quill?  
  
Quill: He says your hair doesn't look like its natural color.  
  
James: Well if you must know, I dye it. He said all that in just one word?  
  
Quill: Its a very complex language. What is your natural hair color, anyway?  
  
James: You know that color my hair was when I was dressed as a girl in the St. Anne episode?  
  
Quill: Yeah...  
  
James: (Nods his head)  
  
Quill: Yuck.  
  
Kojiro: *I NEED TO LEARN ENGLISH!*  
  
Quill: *Sigh, come over here, Kojiro, I'll teach you some.*  
  
James: Since when do you speak Japanese?  
  
Quill: I don't.  
  
All: (Blink)  
  
Quill and Kojiro: (Temporarily go away)  
  
Gary: I wonder...  
  
James, Jessie, and Ash: NO.  
  
Brock: Cows? Uh, I have none.  
  
Satoshi: Ash, don't you have some Tauros? Those are a little like cows...  
  
Ash: No. James owns all of them.  
  
Kojiro: (With a really weird accent, yes even weirder than Takeshi's!) You bastard,   
I only have one Poke'mon!  
  
James: How did that happen?!  
  
Quill: (Holds up a book)  
  
James: (reads) "How to learn English in 10 seconds." O...K...  
  
Quill: See?  
  
Kojiro: Dude! Now I just have to get rid of this geeky accent, and  
  
James: I see you threw a couple new words in too!  
  
Quill: Uh huh.  
  



End file.
